Mr. Rohl needs a hobby? Donald C Stewart

Date: 15th November 2025

Mr. Rohl needs a hobby?

Donald C Stewart

A sketchy and humorous look at the outpourings of the great, the good and the not so good of Scottish fitba’ by Donald C Stewart. Readers are warned that if they take this seriously then therapy is available – just let us know where you find it so we can pass it on to others…

 

Following a dismal period in Europe, abroad, out of Govan, scouting fur wur holibags, once again, for yet another time, Rangers Football Club have put out a call for anybody who can provide Mr Rohl the new manager with a hobby.

Following the witty banner that was displayed at the last home game against Roma stating that the Rangers wisnae a hobby (I am paraphrasing here) this is wur lives n that, from what is believed to be the Intercity City Firm The Rangers have been whispering in corridors that perhaps providing the new manager with a hobby would help him.

Previous manager Russell Martin, last seen hustled into the back of a taxi n Falkirk and never seen again, did like a dip in a Loch to relax. On a side note rumours that the taxi into which he got was a Morris Minor driven by a Mr Rodger, previously of Parkhead have been refuted on account of “it wisnae Brendan”.

Insiders have said that Mr Rohl himself, actually talking on his ain behalf has shaken his head at the suggestion. In fact, he opined that there were a lot of people around Ibrox that had too many people on the park who seemed to have a singular hobby: watching and not following the round spherical object travelling between them and frequently beyond them.

Mr Rohl got support from those outside of Ibrox but who had some connection and experience of the Big Hoose. Pundits Mr Thompson and Mr McCoist were heard on air suggesting that this job was a lot bigger than anyone first thought. Mr Thompson, in particular, was critical of the current squad, noting they were like a number of Big Bad Wolves that “huffed and puffed” but were “not good enough”.

Mr McCoist went a little further asking if the club had signed anyone better than who they’ve let go and that it will take more than one transfer window but three to get the whole thing right because he described it as a “big, big job”.

There have been many other big, big jobs in Rangers over the last decade or so. Mr Gerrard, previously at Ibrox, who then went off to Birmingham, had a sojourn in Saudi Arabia also had a big, big job back in the day was offered this big, big job, but he didn’t feel the time was right for him to come back for this particular big, big job.

Mr Rohl also felt initially that the big, big job was just too big, big for him and he turned it down with a big, big apology. The handbrake turn that he did to return to take this big, big job may be one that he is beginning to regret.

Some have made the suggestion that something away from the hurly-burly of the big, big job at the Big Hoose would perhaps help Mr Rohl relax enough into the job to give him a perspective that would allow him to replace all the Bad, Bad Wolves on the park.

Following the Roma game, the Rangers faithful were back to the bread and butter and the Premiership with a trip to Dundee where there the Blues manager, Elvis in the building has managed to get a win against their biggest rivals, Celtic already this season – sending Mr. Rodgers off somewhere that is not, apparently a taxi rank.

And following a rank performance against the Italians, The Rangers recorded a 4-0 win against the Dundee. Elvis has, however, got a wee big job that has been going much better than was thought by the Dundee faithful, not least a wee ginger dude in the Director’s Box.

In other wee big job news, Mr Thelin in Aberdeen seems to be turning the tide in his wee big job up there whilst at Motherwell there is a wee big job that’s not going particularly well. Other wee big jobs include one in Kirkcaldy which has seen the back of Mr. Robson following a few wins, some losses and the decision to relieve him of his duties. That is certainly not something being suggested of Mr. Rohl in his big, big job, which is clearly held to different standards…

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Tags: oor Donald, Rangers