SFSA BLUE PLAQUES LAUNCH FIND OUT MORE
Date: 6th February 2026
Who sings the new club record???
Donald C Stewart
A sketchy and humorous look at the outpourings of the great, the good and the not so good of Scottish fitba’ by Donald C Stewart. Readers are warned that if they take this seriously then therapy is available – just let us know where you find it so we can pass it on to others…
Confusion reigned in Leith as people asked who is singing the new club record.
Ironically, whilst people are vying to record the new song for the Scotland’s World Cup campaign, there are some in Leith exercising their vocal cords having heard that Hibs have a new club record.
The Hibee faithful can rest easy we can exclusively reveal – Sunshine in Leith will not be displaced.
Easter Road is not now nor any time in the future will be, conducting some form of X Factor audition or have Simon Cowell turn up at training, because there is no new club record being sung any time soon.
Well…
Unless you are talking about Kieron Bowie who has set a new club record, where you can hear the Treasurer of Hibernian FC singing sweetly. “We’re in the money…”
According to Easter Road insiders, none of whom we talked to, they couldnae hold a tune in a bucket.
That did not stop a number of people in pubs round about the Leith, though sources suggest it might have been in Gorgie, their geography being a bit ropy, chatting about how they were really surprised because they didn’t know that the boy Bowie could actually sing.
Then some wit in the corner suggested that perhaps he had some form of lineage and he was a distant cousin 15 times removed from yon David Bowie.
Maureen from Cornwall, recently moved from a castle where she claimed to have dealt with the likes of Robbie Williams, told some story about a tour in the 1960s where she met him for the first time and many things happened that could have made him Kieran’s great auntie.
Nobody gave this any kind of credence mainly because it’s not true.
What is true is that Hibs have sold on 23-year-old Kieran Bowie who scored 15 goals in his 52 appearances after he signed from the London outfit Fulham in 2024 for a record club fee.
Margaret, unwilling to give up the audience she had gathered, then suggested it might have been yon time she was a char lady in the East End that the boy David had met her, however, many by this time had fallen asleep from her long-winded narrative, which was still going up and beyond yon time.
Meanwhile in the semi-real world, the actual record set was “a substantial sum of in excess of the £4.4 million that Celtic paid for Scott Brown” in 2007. It means that this will bolster their squad kitty, and whilst the exact fee received from the Italian side to which he has gone, Verona, is going to remain a closely guarded secret, most hope that the directors will not be shy in splashing the cash for some new players.
The SFA were said to be delighted. Steve Clarke can now cover more players between now and the World Cup in tips to Italy. He can in one visit, take in all the Scottish players in Italy likely to form the backbone of our team facing AFCON finalists Morocco, the might of Brazil and Haiti in the summer.
Whilst wishing Kieran all the best with his move, the sporting director at Hibs, Malky Mackay, might have suggested that this is going to be an incredible, incredible opportunity for young Bowie to make his mark on Italian football and provide Scotland with an opportunity to progress in the World Cup. He might have but we weren’t listening but think he should have said that or something similar to that anyway.
The type of record, we are hoping that Steve Clarke will break come July 2026 is to get out the groups stages – even the wits on Gorgie would celebrate that…
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